I Really Do Miss Them

As a “veteran” parent to a 15 year old and a 12 year old, residential camp is becoming more and more of a regular occurence as my kids grow up.

It was one thing when they were little pups…either we would keep them in the daycare summer program (basically a jazzed up version of daycare), or we would enrol them in day camp programs so that each and every night, they would be home for supper and in their beds close to my wife and I.

Over the past year or so, this has changed.

My fifteen year old just recently returned from a month away at a leadership training program at a camp in northern Ontario.

It was tough slugging for her, with early morning long distance runs, early swims in the cold lake, coupled with orienteering and canoe trips. She really tested herself and came home fit, more confident and maybe a little more independent (we are crossing our fingers on that one!).

My 12 year old, just left for 17 days at a sleep over camp and as was the case with her big sister, my heart is emptier since she left.

I don’t care what happens in the days and weeks leading up to camp. Yes, there is fighting and bickering over what to pack and our is tested as we butt heads with our kids…but the second they get on that bus, all that was erased from memory and what remains is the empty feeling I have as I cannot wait for them to come home.

This morning, my wife sent a few pictures of my 12 year old as she arrived at camp yesterday. There was a picture of her getting off the bus, a picture of her and her cabin mates and a few pictures of her swimming in the lake.

I look at these pictures and know deep down how much fun she is having and how many great experiences she will have and how many awesome memories she will be creating for herself. But I also look at these pictures and think about how gorgeous her eyes are, how beautifully soft her hair is, how great it smells after she hops out of the shower. I think about all the cute nicknames we have for each other and all the great conversations she and I have together. I think about the feel of her hand on my back when she sometimes tickles my back or massages my neck when it is sore.

I think about my older daughter’s crazy antics…about how much she makes us laugh. I think about all her funny come-backs to my wife and I when we ask her to do something around the house. I think about how messy her bedroom is (well I don’t really…I get angry when I think about that), I think about how empty our house is when she is not around.

As parents of younger children, my advice to you is to hold onto your kids…don’t wish away all the stress and aggravation that comes with raising little babies and toddlers. Believe me when I tell you, that it will all mean absolutely nothing to you when they are older. Your babes will grow up super fast and if you don’t take the proper time enjoy your children and adapt the right mindset in raising them, you will miss out.

While it is true that my wife and I have more time together and there is less bickering and arguing around the house, I miss my kids when they are not here.

I cannot wait to have them all home again soon.